


Exposure

by Anonymous_Creator



Category: Critical Role (Web Series) RPF
Genre: Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Heavy BDSM, Kink Negotiation, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-15
Updated: 2018-11-15
Packaged: 2019-08-24 00:59:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16629860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anonymous_Creator/pseuds/Anonymous_Creator
Summary: Matthew's interview left some of his most sensitive issues, such as his struggle with body dysmorphic disorder, floating hazardously close to the surface. His proposed solution is a bit... unorthodox.





	Exposure

**Author's Note:**

> The first rule of shipping real life humans is -- don't ship the real life humans. Especially don't ship them anywhere they can SEE it. And for the good grace of green apples don't mention it in places outside of this. This is weird. You're here too, welcome to my weird, weirdling. Enjoy it, but let's respect the real life humans and keep it on the down low.
> 
> I also appreciate comments, all that being said. If you're feeling brave.

Taliesin grabbed Matt by the ring on his collar and pushed him into the wall. They both connected against the hard concrete with a satisfying force. Matt exhaled with the impact and Taliesin smiled.

“I’ve been waiting a very, very long time to do this,” he said. Taliesin's fingers reached into Matt’s hair and tangled in it.

Matt was panting, hands crossed behind his back, caught by the leather jacket that was yanked down to his waist to reveal a simple white dress shirt. Taliesin knew the jacket had been a good loan for the night.

“You’ve been waiting?” Matt managed to say. The light was dark enough that Taliesin had to work to see the little details in Matt’s face. The flush, the sweat. The desire.

The House music was overwhelming, nearly deafening in its volume. Rhythm called to him. Begged him to follow it. To lick. To tug. To flog. To fuck.

Gods.

Taliesin lavished a long, wet kiss on his little pet, let his tongue drag across Mathew's face and trail down to his shoulder. He bit there, hard. Heard Matthew gasp and curse. Smiled as he rubbed his other hand over Matthew’s hard cock through his jeans.

Taliesin breathed deeply as he rubbed his cheek against Matthew. Just the scent of him was intoxicating. And that little whimper when he nibbled on Matthew’s ear? How had they not done this years ago?

Artificial smoke drifted through the venue, managed by someone who was paid to be sober and responsible tonight. Taliesin and Matt had the bands for sober and private play on their wrists. The perks of a well-managed playground -- he had no worries that anyone here would approach them to try to join in or mention their participation outside these walls.

Taliesin spent his time teasing Matthew. The man was a gift to a Dominant. So fucking responsive. Matthew was a wire of electricity, stripped raw, that jumped with little flicks of current at the slightest touch.

“You are fucking divine,” Taliesin said, speaking directly into Matthew’s ear to ensure he would be heard.Taliesin marveled at his own voice, rough and deep with his own pleasure.

“Fuck.” Matthew was pulling air like he was running a marathon, his pupils dilated. “Gods. Tal.”

Taliesin spun him around and pushed him in front of him, his hands firmly on Matthew’s wrists. He guided him to a piece of equipment in the center of the venue.

Matthew pushed back into him, nearly digging in his heels. Taliesin gave him a little shake and he acquiesced, becoming nearly limp in his grasp.

 

_“I want to be pushed. I need to be…” Matthew paused and searched for words. Taliesin sat on the couch next to Matt, Marisha perched in a chair next to them, a supportive, if hovering, presence._

_“I want to be exposed,” he said. He barely spoke above a whisper. As if he were offering a rough and bleeding scrap of his soul._

_Every protective, dominant instinct screamed in Taliesin to cradle Matthew. To nourish him. Provide the pain and catharsis._

_“We can work towards that,” Taliesin said, pleased that his voice didn’t betray how strongly he felt.“I have some ideas…”_

 

The straps were familiar and Taliesin enjoyed nipping at Matthew’s wrists before he attached the restraints. He tossed the leather jacket to the ground near Matthew’s shoes and socks. Matthew shook.

No, that wasn’t enough to describe it. Every exhale rattled out of him. Every inhale was a stuttery struggle. It was one of the most beautiful sights of Taliesin’s life.

“Oh my little pet. We’ve only just begun.” Taliesin said as he leaned against Matthew. His weight pulled against Matthew’s arms as he draped himself over his pet and rubbed himself slowly up and down his leg, letting their hard cocks incidentally touch through rough fabric.

“I can’t.” Matthew said. An edge of panic, real, honest panic, rolled over him. Taliesin could see the wildness hit his eyes as he yanked at the restraints.“Taliesin. No.” He was nearly screaming now. “No. No no no no no.”

Taliesin cradled Matthew against him, held him as he sobbed. Whispered soothing words of comfort to his pet. For his strength. For his gift. Kissed the tears on his eyelids as he whimpered.

 

_“Its more than that. I have to give up the choice. I have to. I have to know that you’ll do it. Or it’s pointless.” Matthew was sitting on the couch, his arms wrapped around his knees, looking up at the two of them like they might somehow be his saviors._

_Taliesin knew that deep feeling too well. The dark waters, the uncharted places that people pushed into out of need, not want. He took a moment to choose his words._

_“Playing without a safe word is another level entirely. You’re entrusting your entire physical and mental wellbeing to my judgement. I can’t promise you, if we start this, we’ll get to a point where that happens. No responsible person would offer you that quickly, if at all.”_

 

“You want this.” Taliesin said as Matthew sobbed into his shoulder. “You want this. Tell me how you want this.”

Matthew violently shook his head against Taliesin and screamed. Taliesin swallowed the sound with a violent kiss. “It’s okay. You’re safe. I’m here. You’re mine. Give yourself to me. All of yourself,” he said. His words were a cadence to weave a soothing spell on his pet.

He had expected to bear witness to this pain. It burned Taliesin as much as Matthew, but that was the part his pet didn’t need to realize. Not right now, at least.

Strangers walked in the dimness beyond the well of light that fell on their play area. Taliesin saw how Matthew’s gaze flickered from Taliesin to those unknown beings.

“Are you worried they will see you, little one?” Taliesin said. His voice was a low growly rumble as his hand reached down Matthew’s jeans. “Afraid they’ll see how fucking hard you are right now?”

“Taliesin,” Mathews whispered, the words inaudible over the rumble of the bass, only the shape of his lips recognizable. “Please. Fuck. No. Stop.”

Taliesin ran his hands through Matt’s hair and used it to pull his head back in a delicious arc.

“You’d have to speak louder than that to catch my attention,” Taliesin said in a conversational way. “Stop fucking around, and tell me you want this.”

Matt screamed. A real, terrified, wrenching scream. The kind that caused the venue safety monitor to come into his field of view. Taliesin flashed a discrete thumbs up behind Matt’s head with one hand. The safety monitor returned the gesture and stepped aside. He'd spoken to management about the nature of this scene earlier today.

Matthew fell limp against the straps, his entire weight in the wrists.

Ah. There it was. The release. Psychological flooding was such a tricky thing.

Whispered praise and soft touches. A light sense of seduction. Matthew shuddered. Mouthed something. Taliesin put his ear next to Matthew’s mouth.

“Please,” he heard. Over and over.

Taliesin pulled Matthew close to him, hands roaming over his back and ass.

“Stand for me.” He said and pulled away. And waited.

Matthew’s muscles in his arm quivered against his own weight. Taliesin winced. He’d be sore a week after this. Still.

Matthew got one foot under him and used its support to lurch to a stand and ease the weight on his arms.

Good. Good. Taliesin sighed in relief, a private moment to praise the Gods, great and small, that Matthew was pushing through to the other side.

Well. Here we go.

 

_Marisha nearly lost her footing on her chair. “You want him to do what now?”_

 

Taliesin stroked Matt’s cheek and licked his hand to taste the salt on it. “Can you say it now?”

“Please.” Matthew said. His eyes were soft. The wildness was gone. This was resignation tinged with something greater, something more significant. Surrender.

Taliesin kissed Matthew deeply, exploring his mouth and lips with a thorough dedication. “I love how you say please, little one.”

Matthew’s tremulous smile nearly broke Taliesin into pieces. He turned to wipe at his own tears and stopped. No. Let him see.

“You have to say it, Matthew.”

The music cascaded around them. In the far corners of the space lights shifted in subtle patterns, bathing the space in red and purple hues. Here, on the equipment, the spotlight showered them in golden light.

“Please, do it.”

Taliesin felt his heart literally skip. A little double jump that his doctor assured him wasn’t a problem as long as it was every once in a while.

“Say it.” The words felt ripped out of him.

“I want this.” Matthew leaned his cheek into Taliesin’s hand.

Taliesin kissed him on the forehead, unable to hide the tremble in his hands and lips.

“As it pleases you, my pet.”

Taliesin reached into his pocket and pulled out a pair of safety scissors. The jeans he snipped from the ankle and worked his way up the line of the leg to the thigh before retreating and repeating the process up the other leg. He left the waistband intact and turned to the button down dress shirt that had been hiding under the leather jacket.

Matthew was on the edge of hyperventilating before Taliesin could begin on the shirt. “Hey. Hey lovely. Breath with me.” In and out. Slow steady breathes. The scissors still in his hand as he cradled Matthew’s head next to his own. Matthew still trembled but his breathing slowed. It was enough.

He cut from the bottom of the shirt, under the arms, up around the back, leaving it to drape loosely from the neck.

Two little snips, through the waistband and the shirt collar, and Matthew would be naked.

 

_“I can’t explain it,” Matthew was in tears. Marisha wrapped her arms around him as he rocked on the couch. Taliesin knelt in front of Matthew and held his hands._

_“I know I’m fucked up,” Matthew said with a resigned certainty._

_“NO.” Taliesin said with unintended force. “No,” he said more reasonably. “You’re beautiful.” Taliesin kissed those hands and wondered if and when he would kiss more._

 

Taliesin held the safety scissors up to Matthew’s lips. Matthew tentatively kissed them.

“What a lovely pet you are. How kind of you to offer yourself to me.” Taliesin couldn’t drive down the sexual purr in his voice. There was too much energy sparking in him to keep this bit of the scene soft. Well. Best laid plans.

He put the scissors against Matt’s leg, let him feel the cold metal against his skin. Matt whimpered and closed his eyes. Taliesin's other hand glided softly over Matthew’s ass as he cut through the pants and helped them fall to the floor.

His head was close to Matthew’s mouth so he heard the words. The panic reborn, rising. A rapid babble.

Taliesin dropped the safety scissors and gripped Matthew's head with both hand to force him to look into Taliesin’s eyes.

“You’re mine. You’re safe. You’re loved. You will survive this. It will hurt you. You want this. Give me your pain.”

Matthew stopped speaking so fast his words sounded like Pentecostal Tongues and gasped for breath.Taliesin smiled and swallowed to settle his own stomach.

“There you are, pet.” He showered a few kisses over Matthew’s temple. “This is where we are. This is what we’re doing.”

Matthew nodded a few times, the movement jerky.

“Good pet.”

Taliesin bent and picked up the safety scissors. He again offered them for a kiss. Matthew exhaled harshly a few times, then his breath settled. He gingerly pressed his mouth to the scissors.

Taliesin snipped through the shirt collar. It fluttered to the ground.

 

 _The tea was long cold but Taliesin sipped it regardless. It gave him time to form his words. “All those things are possible. I mean, assuming…” He paused and glanced at Marisha._

 

Matthew was naked, his clothes in tatters around his feet. The straps kept his arms above his head and his hair fell around his face, the only shield left to him.

Taliesin felt a hand touch his shoulder and he turned toward Marisha. She was gorgeous in a tight skirt, kitten heels, and a vampy lace top that may have been filched from his closet.

She looked at him with an edge of heat tempered with concern. He nodded to her and stepped aside.

They spoke, her arms gently crossed around his neck, her auburn hair falling in artful curls around his face. He couldn’t hear the words over the constant drive of the music but he didn’t need to. He saw their body language shift. Limbs drew closer, hands wandered. Bodies strained to touch. Physical tension replaced with sexual tension.

Taliesin stepped back and leaned against a support beam for the elevated walk way in the venue, where the light was softer and more distant. Marisha knelt in front of Matthew and took him into her mouth, her hands grabbing Matthew’s ass and pulling him deep into her throat.

Matthew groaned and strained against the restraints. His head snapped up and he met Taliesin’s eyes. Taliesin stroked himself through his jeans, watching Matthew’s body writhe as Marisha lavished his cock with attention. His eyes never left Matthews face as he unzipped his jeans and pulled out his cock and began to stroke himself.

Matthew bucked hard. “Fuck. God Please, just fucking do it, fuck. Please.”

Matthew pleaded. Over and over. Louder and louder. Desperate. Hungry.

Taliesin stroked himself harder, feeling his orgasm building. He walked back into the light and circled around the pair. Seared every inch of bare flesh into his mind.

He stood behind Matthew and put his left hand on his shoulder. Taliesin leaned into Matthew, felt him strain into Marisha’s mouth. His lips and tongue found Matthew’s ear and he nibbled and bit at it with a fervor.

“You are so fucking beautiful.” He said it again and again and then it was too much. He came, the groan harsh in his throat. He rubbed his wet cock over Matthew’s back and wiped his slick hand on his side.

Matthew bucked wildly and pushed over the edge. Marisha left scratches on his ass as she struggled to keep him in her mouth past the point of orgasm, pushing him.

He whimpered and thrust a few more times, a devastated cry ripped from him before he lost his balance and leaned backwards against Taliesin.

Taliesin caught him and whispered sweet and gentle words in his ear. Marisha looked up at Taliesin and quirked an eyebrow. Taliesin gave her a pointed glance at the restraints.

Marisha rapidly removed them, as they had practiced, and Matthew turned and nearly collapsed to the floor as he fell into Taliesin’s arms.

“Hey now, lovely,” he murmured in Matthew’s ear. “I may be your God but I do need you to hold your own weight for a few more moments.”

Matthew nodded and managed to push up from one knee. Marisha cleared their mess into a duffel bag and wrapped Matthew in a blanket.

They guided him out of the din of the main venue and through a set of doors, down a hall, and into a room with a variety of second and third hand couches and chairs. Two other groups were here and occupied distinctly separate spaces while they talked quietly.

They settled Matthew in a corner as far from the others as possible. The music was fainter here, a muffled reminder of the raw energy outside. Marisha sat next to Matt and held him over the blanket.

“Here, drink a little water for me, lovely.” Taliesin said as he held up a water bottle. Matthew managed a few sputtering sips. He was still breathing hard. Too hard. Still deep in it.

Taliesin started to breathe with Matthew. He didn’t say anything, just followed Matthew’s breath. When Taliesin had caught the rhythm he started to slow it slightly. He squeezed Matthew’s hand on the exhale.

They’d practiced this. Slowly finding center. Finding self.

Matthew said headspace felt like flying. The breath was a link to gravity.

The tears started then. Not heartrending sobs like earlier. Soft. Profound.

Healing? Gods, Taliesin hoped so.

Matthew managed to scrub away some tears and caught Taliesin’s eyes.

“Hey astronaut.” Taliesin said. He smiled softly.

“H-hey.” Matt said.

“You ready to come back to Earth?”

Matt nodded and ducked his head towards Taliesin. Taliesin pulled a small silver key with a little heart on it from his locket and unlocked the collar from around Matt’s neck. He delicately kissed the now bare skin on Matt’s neck and put the collar out of sight in the bag.

“You were absolutely amazing.” Taliesin said.

“I can’t believe how gorgeous you looked.” Marisha looked a little dazed herself.

“Oh my God.” Matthew said softly. He looked from Marisha to Taliesin and back. “That--it happened. I-I. I…” He trailed off and leaned his head on Marisha’s shoulder. Marisha looked at him with concern but he nodded at her. This wasn’t unexpected.

“He’s got a lot to process. That’s okay. We can stay as long as we need to.”

They stayed over an hour. He helped get both of their heads wrapped back around reality. He did wonder, as he flipped through the extraordinary limited rolodex of people he could possible discuss this with for his own decompression, who in the hell was going to reassemble him.

Holiest of Fucks. He needed a shower, and a nap, and a really good, long, hard, satisfying lay. And food.

Right. Get the little ones home and tucked into bed. Food was at the house. Everything else possibly available at the house.

Taliesin pulled himself together and used the plans laid out in advance to get them all safely home. He texted Liam and told him he could take the rest of the night off, no emergencies to tend to, thanks for waiting up.

He got around eighty percent of his needs immediately met and considered himself a God amongst Men. His collapse onto the bed was less than dignified. Marisha wandered into the bedroom and gave him a peck on the cheek.

“Awh, I think we wore him out,” she said as she squished and snuggled to makes space between Taliesin and Matt.Matt let out a sleepy murmur but did roll on his side so she could lay between them.

The room fell quiet and Taliesin sighed, deeply content. His little ones were safe. Happy.

Marisha’s icy foot nudged into his thigh and he nearly bit his tongue to keep from yelping.

“Shh. M’cold,” she muttered near his ear.

Taliesin shook his head and nudged her feet under his thigh to warm them up. 

**Author's Note:**

> I am an advocate for responsible, well negotiated, Kink. Be smart. Be safe. Be savvy. Some rules are more bendy than others -- IF you discuss them in exhaustive detail. Sometimes. Maybe. And are prepared for if things don't go the way you thought they would.
> 
> Generally stick with the rules.


End file.
